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Jan. 4th, 2010 10:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
estiroseI should send out a "help me obi wan friends list" on this one.
Here's the deal. I have to write a 300 words-or-less blurb on top of a 3000-5000 word excerpt and my novel manuscript for the ABNA (Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards). Now, I'm on about page 7 of a 73 page single spaced (for my convenience) manuscript editing-wise. I hope to start merging corrections and editing scenes (most of them have moved the story along, etc at this point, so I'm actually adding words so far instead of taking them out) sometime next Tuesday. I really hate the compressed schedule, but Amazon decided they wanted everything at entry time this year, and I want to be one of the first to submit for the YA category.
Anyway, back to the pitch. I have no problem sharing it in public, as it's not like people aren't sharing theirs in public on the Amazon boards. I really do need a few eyes looking over it and offering suggestions (in terms of is this a novel you want to read, grammar, things to correct/modify/delete, etc). The current version is about 250 words.
What price does one pay for a parent's choices? What price does one pay to be the hope of a species? One girl might find the price for both to be too high....
Fifteen years ago, graduate student Carolina Rulf decided to let an alien surrogate carry her little girl to term. Now her daughter, fourteen year old Erin, is plagued by feelings she doesn't understand, and body parts she doesn't want. After Erin's feelings overwhelm her and she finds herself attacking her best friend, she wants to be fixed. Now. Before she goes crazy.
But the answer is not easy, nor may it be what Erin wants to hear. Furthermore, her plight has captured the attention of the long-reclusive aliens. Aliens she wants nothing to do with, particularly the alien that birthed her. Reluctantly convinced by her starry-eyed librarian mother to meet with them, she agrees, but the meeting goes terribly wrong.
Finding herself abducted by the aliens, Erin must decide what is the most important thing: being the hope of a species, or following her own desires to reconcile with her friend and lead a normal life. Her choice may impact the destiny of the aliens and the humans that interact with them....
DELICATE APPENDAGES is a story in the tradition of Judy Blume with a science fiction twist, the tale of a teenager starting to move into adulthood, discovering herself, her gender identity, and the meaning of gender roles along the way.
Here's the deal. I have to write a 300 words-or-less blurb on top of a 3000-5000 word excerpt and my novel manuscript for the ABNA (Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards). Now, I'm on about page 7 of a 73 page single spaced (for my convenience) manuscript editing-wise. I hope to start merging corrections and editing scenes (most of them have moved the story along, etc at this point, so I'm actually adding words so far instead of taking them out) sometime next Tuesday. I really hate the compressed schedule, but Amazon decided they wanted everything at entry time this year, and I want to be one of the first to submit for the YA category.
Anyway, back to the pitch. I have no problem sharing it in public, as it's not like people aren't sharing theirs in public on the Amazon boards. I really do need a few eyes looking over it and offering suggestions (in terms of is this a novel you want to read, grammar, things to correct/modify/delete, etc). The current version is about 250 words.
What price does one pay for a parent's choices? What price does one pay to be the hope of a species? One girl might find the price for both to be too high....
Fifteen years ago, graduate student Carolina Rulf decided to let an alien surrogate carry her little girl to term. Now her daughter, fourteen year old Erin, is plagued by feelings she doesn't understand, and body parts she doesn't want. After Erin's feelings overwhelm her and she finds herself attacking her best friend, she wants to be fixed. Now. Before she goes crazy.
But the answer is not easy, nor may it be what Erin wants to hear. Furthermore, her plight has captured the attention of the long-reclusive aliens. Aliens she wants nothing to do with, particularly the alien that birthed her. Reluctantly convinced by her starry-eyed librarian mother to meet with them, she agrees, but the meeting goes terribly wrong.
Finding herself abducted by the aliens, Erin must decide what is the most important thing: being the hope of a species, or following her own desires to reconcile with her friend and lead a normal life. Her choice may impact the destiny of the aliens and the humans that interact with them....
DELICATE APPENDAGES is a story in the tradition of Judy Blume with a science fiction twist, the tale of a teenager starting to move into adulthood, discovering herself, her gender identity, and the meaning of gender roles along the way.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-05 09:55 am (UTC)is she actually turning into a dude? inquiring minds. And does she have a special sentai besties relationship with her bff?
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Date: 2010-01-05 10:34 pm (UTC)My biggest real issue here is the "hope of a species" bit. For one, she's neither an alien nor the savior of them, so it's a bit misleading. The other thing is that you reuse the phrase, and a pitch is too short to get away with that.
I'm not in editing mode, sorry.